There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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