I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
this must be what syphilis tastes like
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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