Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
