And to think..we used to do everything sober...
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
