I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
