My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize