Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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