no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize