Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I hate your face
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I want to walk on stilts...naked
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
