She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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