I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
