Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
