I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
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