Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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