I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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