best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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