I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
