I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
