Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
