I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
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