I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
