We won't sleep together?
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
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