ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
false alarm. still invincible.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
