Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
