Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
