Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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