hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
