I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
