At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
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