girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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