don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
