Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
