I want to stick my p in your. b.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
