Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
This is the high leading the old right now
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Randomize
