I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
we're so committed to being not committed
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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