turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize