yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Bring me that man meat
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
