You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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