I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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