My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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