The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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