Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
wow bdsm is so cute
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize
