My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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