THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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