Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
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