Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
More tranny stories later!
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
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