i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
