My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Randomize
