so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize