He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
